"Quarter Life Crisis"

Recently I read quite a few blog posts from people who are roughly the same age as me, some are younger. They have been feeling a lot of negative emotions and are slowly slipping into what I call “Realized Depression” (oo, psychologist na ako, lol!). They are so overwhelmed with sadness, worthlessness and despondency form many different sources, in many different forms. They don’t know what to do, how to do it and when to do it. I received an email (which I modified a bit) aptly explaining this feeling. Now, this post is not to scare teens when they reach that age (20 to 25). Teens can think of this post as something informative and revealing, or for everyone to acknowledge that a lot of twenty something young adults who are experiencing this so called “quarter life crisis”. It may or may not happen to you when you reach this age and know that not all twenty something people are going through this. Teens may have all the angst, but young adults have all the drama. Lol! This is more or less how young adults, like me, feel:

> It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

> You are forced into decisions not your own but of your parent or guardian. Consistently being forced into a world you did not want… You know they only want what’s best for you, but not exactly what you want and love. You then hate yourself and despise the life you live. You don’t want to be a burden, so you take any way out.

> You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

> You look at your job, if you have one... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you. You feel worthless and everything you do just isn’t quite good enough. Acceptance is only given when we are flawless. You feel like you are always under the microscope…Each mistake is magnified…

> Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

> You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but also love someone else or you might also love someone who is in love with another and cannot figure out why you are doing this, because you know that you aren't a bad person.

> One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts look pathetic. You yearn for that lasting fulfilling passion felt by those who are truly in love, but that doesn’t mean you are in a hurry for marriage.

> You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender! What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

A post dedicated to my Contemporaries, my “age colleagues”. My Generation… Once again, not everyone experiences the Twenty-Something Syndrome. Some may only experience a few symptoms. Some may completely disagree even, and say that they don’t feel like this when they were twenty-something. We face life through different occurrences and varying perspectives. I think even some teenagers may already say they are experiencing this. I honestly am subjected to quite a few… Let’s not go into any details… Just know that I take all of this in strides. Little by little I handle each fear, each emotion, each challenge… It’s our mind and our heart’s way of saying, “I DON”T WANT TO BE AN ADULT YET!” We should take all of this drama as the greatest barrier preventing us from moving forward with our life.

And once I get over this, I still have a few more years to enjoy life before a new crisis rears its ugly head…Hay, buhay nga naman! Lol!